who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
there is glitter all over my balls
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
