do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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