Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
