two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
