they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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