hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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