I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
