her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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