i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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