Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Duck Duck Cougar?
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
