Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
