If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
