she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
