I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
that may or may not have been my penis.
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