drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
