I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
