Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
