I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
