Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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