currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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