it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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