you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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