Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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