): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize