i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
