he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
