Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
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