Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind

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(808): View more from Hawaii

He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.

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(813): View more from Florida

I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday

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(320): View more from Minnesota

3pm strippers are depressing

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(509): View more from Washington

I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape

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(253): View more from Washington

You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.

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(813): View more from Florida

She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.

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