I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
We don't watch enough power rangers
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
