Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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