You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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