I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
