Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
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