U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
