Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
