You don't have asthma, your pregnant
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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