you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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