Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
did i walk over a car last night?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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