Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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