i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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