Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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