Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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