come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize