so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
