So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
