she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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