She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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