She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
