So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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