i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
