its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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